Visit Our Site @

This listing is not being advertised.


Price: $845 Available: Now.

APARTMENTMAN Sitting behind the counter at his new job at Starbucks, JOHNNY BORING (TM) sweeps the coffee grounds from underneath the rubber mats lining the Starbucks floors. How did this happen How did he go from being the 19 year old president of his own dot com start up, to sweeping coffee grounds How can it happen that one moment you're sipping double iced lattes in Seattle chatting stock option strategies with Bill Gates, and the next moment "Billy" won't even return your phone calls . (Maybe it was a little presumptuous to call him "Billy" but, heh, he seemed like such a pal.) Suddenly the reveries of his former financial superstardom are shattered by a voice from across the counter "Heh, I want a decaf double latte with low fat milk. and a non fat scone." (Is there really such a thing as a non fat scone ) Needing to escape from the shackles of his daily routine, JOHNNY BORING (TM) utters one of the many phrases that allows him to escape the absurdity of someone with a Ph.D. in molecular biology from MIT cleaning the rest rooms in Starbucks. The words come readily to his pursed lips "Fee, Fi, Fo, Fum, APARTMENTMAN (TM) here I come." (There are those of you out there who may not appreciate the poetic artistry of super hero transformation phrases. Granted W.B. Yeats will not feel threatened by the foregoing. However, as a former student with a D- grade in poetry, JOHNNY BORING (TM) struggled to determine what phrase would convey sufficient super hero gravitas, but was simple enough for him to remember it. Hence the clever little ditty.) In a flash JOHNNY BORING (TM) is transformed from from serf of the stars at Starbucks, into the hope of apartment seekers everywhere, APARTMENTMAN. (TM) (These momentary flights of fantasy do help to keep me somewhat sane so thank you for bearing with me.) Using his telescopic vision coupled with his x-ray vision APARTMENTMAN (TM) sees in the distance the apartment you have so patiently been waiting to hear about.. Here it is!! DIMENSIONS/ DESCRIPTION OF APARTMENT: You enter this apartment and before you is the foyer which measures 4 feet x 6 feet. (Actually it really isn't before you since as soon as you walk into the apartment you are in the foyer.) The ceilings are all 9 feet high throughout the apartment and all the floors are hardwood. (It's kind of like being in a basketball court.) To the right is a walk in closet which measures 3 feet x 6 feet. To the left is the kitchen which measures 8.6 feet x 5 feet with a pass through window in the upper right corner. (This is to help you keep the proper temperature of your gourmet Lean Cuisine meals you just popped out of the microwave.) Straight ahead is the living area which measures 13 feet x 13 feet with two windows. To the left of the living room is the bathroom which measures 9 feet x 5 feet and will amaze you with the different shades of purple tile that grace the walls. (This is the opportunity for all you wanna be Martha Stewarts to make all those ever so important distinctions between purple, eggplant, magenta etc. Feel free to let your creative souls soar.) Superintendant on site. Laundry in the basement. Steps from the T. Call ASAP to see. Copyright (2004) James V Castelli Cat OK -


Click any picture to enlarge it.

Click for a map of nearby Public Transportation